Tag Archive: social justice warriors

Divine Advice For Liam Neeson

Dear DA, I’ve lived a long and lucky life. It was a bit rough in the beginning, but I’m not complaining. Life is a struggle for all of us, and you never know what someone might be going through, so when I look back at those who’ve wronged me, I try to understand and learn from it. I’m an old man now and the world has changed a lot over the years, but the one thing that is absolutely clear is that upper middle class white women in their early 20s are completely justified in condemning me for sharing a growing experience I had 40 years ago. I didn’t have to share a story about how a confused, angry young man could change for the better, but I did, and I deserve to be punished. If you ever say, do, or even think anything racist or bigoted ever, you’re shit…
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Divine Advice For Jimmy Kimmel

Dear DA, Am I hosting the Oscars? I thought that little black guy was supposed to do it. Ah, some old homophobic tweets turned up, so he’s out and I’m in. Wait a second. I just called him a little black guy. Is that racist? Like bad enough to get me replaced? I’m really kind of unprepared. I wasn’t even sure if they still did the Oscars. It seems like calling whatshisface a little black guy is okay. Kevin Hart. I just looked it up. Like most people, I’m totally reliant on my phone. If my phone told me that Aliens and Predators had invaded and to hide in the forest, I would probably hide in the forest. You can’t get cell reception out there, so I’d never know when it was safe to come out. I really don’t want to do this Oscars thing. You can tell I’m not…
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