Tag Archive: Superman

Movie Review- Star Wars: The Return of the Jedi

Star Wars: Return of the Jedi Rated PG Return of the Jedi is a symbolic exploration of the difficulties involved in expediting the elusive female orgasm. This theme has been taken up by more recent films such as Man of Steel and Star Wars: The Force Awakens, and was touched upon by the original Star Wars film released in 1977, but nowhere is it as explicit as in Return of The Jedi. The Death Star, like the Empire, is barren and sterile. All is male, grey, and English. Cloaked within this cynicism is the somehow subtle manifestation of death as a feminine sphere, hinting that within death lays the potential for new life. This is most obviously, and prudishly, illustrated by The Force Awakens, in which the destruction of Starkiller Base (aka The Death Star 2.0) culminates with its rebirth as a star. Likewise in Man of Steel, when the…
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The Incredible Hulk Discusses DWB (Driving While Black)

Hulk drive car other day, Hulk drive good, but immediately cop pull Hulk over. He ask license, registration. Hulk confused. Hulk no remember how Hulk end up in car. Cop ask Hulk step out car, do sobriety test. He call Hulk in radio, radio tell Hulk only have Learner’s permit, need supervision experienced driver. Also, car registered Bruce Banner. Who Bruce Banner? Hulk no know. Cop mad, shift almost over, now, must wait tow truck. Car no reported stolen, so Hulk OK. Hulk hear on news, dangerous drive while black, dangerous drive while monster, so Hulk always bring tape recorder. Hulk fall asleep, wake up in car other side of town. Hulk listen to tape recorder, cop ask “who you?”, man answer Bruce Banner, tell cop he supervise Hulk, Hulk drive to park car while in bathroom. Bruce Banner naked, cop try arrest indecent exposure. Bruce Banner drive away and…
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Movie Review- The Shadow

“There is no Shadow. If there were, I’d be Eleanor Roosevelt.” That’s an actual thing Jonathan Winters says while under the influence of the Shadow’s Jedi mind powers. The line was likely improvised by the comedic legend in one of his tiny show-stealing moments of screen time. Russell Mulcahy’s underappreciated 1994 masterpiece The Shadow is one of the best comic book movies of all time. Yes, I know—most people would not agree with that statement. The movie was a huge flop at the box office and has since been all but forgotten. The day was Tuesday, July 5, 1994, and my friends and I were embarking on another one of our “Two-for-Tuesday” adventures. That’s where we would pay to see one movie, then hide in the bathroom afterward for a little while before sneaking back into the theater to see a second movie without paying. It wasn’t what you’d call legal,…
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