Tag Archive: Ozzy Osbourne

Divine Advice For Anthony Fauci

Dear DA, We all know what a shitshow this has been, and working with “The Donald” has been depressing, disgusting, and confusing. This didn’t get real for him until McDonald’s closed. Once he heard about that, he went absolutely crazy. He demanded I stop the virus immediately and had to be physically restrained from threatening McDonald’s (not the CEO, not the local manager, “McDonald’s”) on Twitter. Fortunately, he’s morbidly obese, and can’t physically exert himself or tantrum for more than a few seconds, but it didn’t end there. He called in the White House chefs and raised absolute hell. He demanded they start cooking McDonald’s food, and at this point, they just shrugged their shoulders and accepted it, and crazier still, the food they made is exactly like McDonald’s, except they don’t have the right wrappers or fry holders, and this also made Trump crazy. He accused them of trying…
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