The Incredible Hulk Discusses DWB (Driving While Black)

Hulk drive car other day, Hulk drive good, but immediately cop pull Hulk over. He ask license, registration. Hulk confused. Hulk no remember how Hulk end up in car. Cop ask Hulk step out car, do sobriety test. He call Hulk in radio, radio tell Hulk only have Learner’s permit, need supervision experienced driver. Also, car registered Bruce Banner. Who Bruce Banner? Hulk no know. Cop mad, shift almost over, now, must wait tow truck. Car no reported stolen, so Hulk OK.

Hulk hear on news, dangerous drive while black, dangerous drive while monster, so Hulk always bring tape recorder. Hulk fall asleep, wake up in car other side of town. Hulk listen to tape recorder, cop ask “who you?”, man answer Bruce Banner, tell cop he supervise Hulk, Hulk drive to park car while in bathroom. Bruce Banner naked, cop try arrest indecent exposure. Bruce Banner drive away and laugh.

Hulk drive with Solomon Grundy. Grundy drive bad, but white. Almost never pulled over. Zombie monster, but white. Drive with Black Panther, good driver, always pulled over, cop usually angry. Worst driver, Superman. Superman always walk away crash, scared drive with Superman. Superman almost never pulled over.

Anecdotal evidence, sample size small, but message still clear. Drive while black more dangerous than drive while monster.

H. Seitz

H. Seitz

H. Seitz is the author of the Sci-fi novella "Iron Manimal" and a contributing writer at The Skull Island Times.
H. Seitz

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